I have Dan Wells in my living room. If you want him back alive, send chocolate, a pony, and a Daugherty Visible Typewriter.
All right, all right. You don’t have to send the pony.
He came into town on book tour for I Don’t Want To Kill You, which is a fantastic book. Foolishly, he asked if he could crash at our place, little realizing what that would mean.
Mwahahahaha!
Editing for accuracy…
If you want to see Mary Robinette Kowal again…
Dan Wells is in Mary Robinette’s living room. If you want her back alive, send bacon, an English Bulldog, and an iPad 2.
Dan came into town on book tour. Foolishly, Mary Robinette invited him to crash at her place, little realizing what that would mean…
Yes that does seem
*Snicker*
What I want to know is whether Dan and/or Mary take commissions. You see, there’s this person I need to get rid of…
Obviously you need to send the person over to Mary’s on an errand to deliver chocolate and bacon.
But not bacon flavored chocolate.
What about Chocolate Covered Bacon?
Saw that on the Food Network once, they topped it off with a little Fleur De Sel on top.
Perhaps for Dan’s services. The bacon is a turnoff for me, I’m afraid. Chocolate covered licorice would be fine, though.