The first thing you should know when you call hardware stores in NYC to see if they have axes, is that all of them, without exception, will ask you who you are planning on killing.
The second thing you should know is that after you pick up the axe, you will have no problems finding a seat on the subway.
The third thing is that random passerbys will engage you in conversations like the following.
“Whoa. You mean business,” the man says as he comes out the door and sees you.
“Yeah, well,” you said, not really wanting to explain the show for which the axe is a prop. “There’s not much call for them in the city, I’ll admit.”
“He must have really pissed you off.”
You smile. “It’s so true. There’s really not a reason to have an axe in the city unless you’re planning to off someone.”
If you say that, the passerby will suddenly find something else very interesting on the other side of the street.
All of which makes me wonder why I could buy an axe in a city with no need for cutting firewood.
If there isn’t a story there, there arn’t any stories in New York City.
Having researched this for a story, I can tell you that shurikens and swordsticks are illegal to carry on your person in New York City (there may be theatrical exceptions), but they have to keep axes legal, or else go arresting firefighters willynilly. Which is only funny if you’re not a firefighter.
You know, the question of the legality of carrying the axe occurred to me as I was getting on the subway.
I have to drop it off at the theater this morning. I’ll let you know if I get arrested.
So, who is your one phone call going to be to? And are you going to instruct them to post that you got arrested?
Clearly I would use my phone call to post via text message. Fortunately, I wasn’t stopped.
Things have changed a little over the years. I grew up on long island. When I was in high school I was on the rifle team. All the schools used to have them. The government supplied free amunition and guns. It was fun. Not all that unlike many video games but much harder (It takes a lot of strength to hold a rifle very still and acurately). The point is that we used to cary guns in and out of school all the time. It was common at every school around us. Can you imagine that today? I don’t think that there was ever an incident where someone got hurt. It was the sport with the best safety record. By the way I am a strong supporter of gun control and have never shot anything living.
They sell axes in NYC because people who live in Da Big City like to go camping. Campers use axes for many things (hammers, mostly! but you can actually cut things like fire wood with them.) Stores in cities that would carry something like axes aren’t going to let you go to some country store and buy your axe if they can make a buck.
And there is, after all, the occasional axe-murderer needing supplies!
What I find interesting is that the spell checker which is at work as I type this seems to think that there is something wrong with the word ‘axe’. Go figger.
ray
Ah yes, I could find camping hatchets galore, but wood cutting axes were harder to come by.