Yesterday I found myself crying on four separate occasions. All about rehearsal and feeling stupid and working with [redacted]. I came straight home and went to bed. Slept soundly.
Rehearsal went much better today. Till I blanked on music and wanted to cry.
S–, yesterday, had me do visualizations and role playing to try to deal with my singing anxiety. [1. At this point in my life, I thought that I couldn’t sing and was partnered with an operatically trained baritone in an operetta. My throat would close because I got nervous, even though, by this point, it was clear that I could sing if I could get past the nervousness.]
We had work parties last night and tonight. Things are coming together, but there’s still so much to do. [2. Note: Reading back through this makes me realize that I was apparently in rehearsal for three different shows simultaneously. No wonder I was having meltdowns.]
